Sorry seems to be the hardest word...

I'm sorry, I can't be the man you wanted me to be.
I'm sorry that I can't fulfil your dream for me.
I'm sorry that you are disgusted by the man I've become.
I'm sorry that I can't keep my promise.
I'm sorry that I'm a disappointment to you.
I'm sorry that you will never see me succeed.
I'm sorry that our time remaining is short.
I'm sorry that I cannot promise you things will get better.
I'm sorry that I cannot tell you how I really feel.
I'm sorry for all the times I pushed you away when all you wanted was help.
I'm sorry for the times I never heed your advice.
I'm sorry for the times I didn't pray because I was pissed.
I'm sorry that you have to see me suffer.
I'm sorry that I wasted every opportunity I had.
I'm sorry for being such a coward.
I'm sorry for not being stronger.
I'm sorry for every hug, I miss to give.
I'm sorry for every kiss, I neglect to give.
I'm sorry that after your gone, I will never be loved ever again.

I'm sorry....

No matter how many times I say it, it doesn't take the pain away. I know you wanted to see me happy before you go yet I can't even give you that. All I can give you is this smile of a charade that you always seem to see through. I know you wanted me to find someone to call my own because you didn't get that chance. I want you to know that I'm okay. There is someone, but I think I ruin whatever chances I had. We didn't even know if we would be happy together. I guess we will never will. It's not that I want to give up. I tried moving on. I don't think the time is right. I guess we are just different. No, it's not your fault. Please stop blaming yourself. Please, don't cry. You did your best, please have no regrets. Our time together is shorter than you think and I don't want to spend our final moments together pointing fingers. I had my chance but I blew it because I was too afraid. It's my fault, not yours. Please, don't blame that her. I don't deserve a second chance and that is the truth. That is just who she is. Don't waste your prayers on me, it's not going to work. Save them for yourself. Let's not think about the future, let's just deal with what is now. Don't say it's not too late because it is. That door is closed for me forever. No, please, don't give up. Hang on, just for a few more hours, and those hours will turn to days as days will give you years. The years will not be kind, but I will be here with you even when I'm not. I love you too much to let you go now. Please, just hang on....

~My answers, to her questions...